July 27th, 2015

I’ve lost track of the time…

I lost at Rise to Greatness. I was pinned by Tommy…fucking…Valentine. Goddamn it, I lost again, not only at the biggest event of the SCW pay per view schedule, at the SuperBowl for Supreme Championship Wrestling, but I lost to Tommy Valentine. I am sitting in this hotel room, another room paid for by Olek and the SCW. I think this and I think about what happened the last time I lost to Tommy Valentine. I lost the Underground Championship to that son of a bitch and I came back to my room, where I sat down. I didn’t count the tiles in the floor to wall ceiling. I sat there and I thought about losing to Tommy. I thought about my SCW career and then…

Ha…

…And then I exploded. I destroyed that hotel room. I punched holes in the wall. I slung the television set out of the window into the hotel owner’s car. I carved obscenities into the walls and I wiped my ass with the bedsheets. I can’t recall everything that I did. I just know that I did a lot to warrant a pink slip from the boss man himself. I think about this and I cannot help but laugh about it. I find myself in the same situation, alone in a hotel room, alone to my thoughts. I am thinking about losing to Tommy. I am thinking about my career with the SCW since I’ve returned. I feel the anger boiling inside of me. I feel my hands grasping the baseball bat that I keep around for times where I need to explode or when someone steps out of line. I want to destroy every fucking thing in this room but…

I’m not. I am sitting here, staring at nothing, and thinking.

Tommy Valentine continued his roll. Oh my God everyone is talking about how Tommy Valentine is on fire!!! They are talking about how Merrick Wiseman took a loss, but he seemed to be happy with the result. The result was that I did not win! And Jake Starr, well he didn’t care to begin with. He was just there. Jake Starr was nothing more than filler. I no longer care for Jake Starr. I do not care for Merrick Wiseman. I care about Tommy Valentine. I want him to be healthy. I want him to be on his A game when our paths cross once more, because they will cross and when they do…I will end this. He may not think this is some sort of personal rivalry, but this has become personal. I refuse to be some sort of stepping stone for Tommy Valentine. I refuse to be…

…Underneath Tommy Valentine….

Oh God just the thought of it irks me. He is going to get all of this praise about how he outlasted three other superstars and blah, blah, fucking blah. Tommy Valentine and those in charge of writing columns and posting the Elite 15 can all eat a dick. I am used to not receiving praise or getting credit where it is due. I am used to this. It has become a part of who I am. I am bigger than that. I refuse to stand on the shoulders of those with less. Just as I refuse to explode once again. Just as I refuse to destroy this hotel room. I want to. The urges are there.

But I have to remind myself of something. I have to remind myself that I am in….

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“Rise to Greatness was not a success story for me. I lost again at the biggest event of the year. HaHa. Tommy Valentine got to ride off into the sunset, looking like a superstar, standing tall and victorious. But you see, I know that I should feel bad, but I don’t. I know that I should be upset, but I’m not. The way I look at it is this way. It came down to Tommy and I. Merrick Wiseman and Jake Starr were nothing more than fumes, nothing more than afterthoughts. Tommy and I duked it out, and I managed to lift him up for the Middle Finger to the Establishment, but he wiggled out and planted with a move I am oh so familiar with, the Griever’s Bane. And then he pinned me. The fact that it was a four way match, and that he and I were the last two in the ring, that matters to me. Tommy Valentine did not beat me. I beat me. I handed him a victory, because the poor bastard needed it more than me. I know that I have thrown my temper tantrums and I have left this company after a loss, but that was in the past. I am a new and improved…me.”

“The way I see it, unlike Mr. Valentine, I am bulletproof. I can handle wins and losses. I may not have shown it in the past, but once again, that was the past. Wins and losses truly do not make me look weak or less than others. If I relied on the SCW to promote me then yeah it would be a different issue, but since I am promoting myself, since I am in CONTROL, I know that I am going to be fine. I know that I am bulletproof. I know that I am still going to be one of the biggest names in this business. I will make millions of dollars in this profession. Tommy Valentine wants to open up a wrestling school and give back to the industry. Everyone wants to give back to this industry that takes so much from us. I am not looking to give back. I am not here to give back. I am here to drain this motherfucker for all it is worth and then some.”

“That is what makes me the perfect foil for the heroes of this company. Heroes like Tommy Valentine. Heroes like my upcoming opponent for the next edition of Breakdown.“

“Hey Merrick….”

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July 27th, 2015

…Control….

It would be so easy to revert back to my old ways and piss all over this room. It would be so easy to carve the words “FUCK SCW” into the walls of this room. It would be so easy to create all kinds of destruction and mayhem within these four walls, but I’m not going to do so. It seems much easier to not do so. I mean, when I did that sort of thing last time, it cost me my job. At the time, I hated it. I hated working for Oleska Drachewych and I hated competing against people like Tommy Valentine, David Helms. I hated knowing men like Syren and Reagan Street were competing in main events, getting all kinds of recognition while I was down at the bottom, barely getting noticed. It drove me insane, which is something the entire world knows to be true. I couldn’t help it.

But I can help it now. I am in control now. If I were to resort back to those sort of actions then I would be proving everyone else right and I have never fancied myself as a guy who does that. I refuse to prove anyone right other than myself, because everyone else can kiss my black ass. Only my opinion matters when it comes to my wrestling career, or my personal life. I can buy and sell the SCW in the blink of a fucking eye and nobody knows it. I could put retards like Tommy Valentine and Merrick Wiseman out on the streets, leaving them without a pot to piss in at the drop of a goddamn dime. They really have no idea how good they have it. The same could be said for Oleska Drachewych, who rests comfortably as he leans on his cane, soon to be a walker, because I have not forgotten about the match proposal with that old gimp. It still stands. I will have to mention it once again.

Mental note…

Speaking of my mentality, I am calm, cool and collected. To be honest, I am actually in a pretty chill state. I am surprised at myself in a kinda sorta way that I haven’t acted out and destroyed the property that surrounds me. I have told myself over and over, like a broken record, or that annoying song that gets stuck on repeat, that I will get my hands on Tommy Valentine, that he and I will meet in that ring sooner rather than later. Knowing and understanding this makes me happy. It fills me with joy. I have told myself that I will find myself in the ring against Merrick Wiseman, and I will be able to kick his ass from pillar to post, that there will be no fucking double count out or a fucking disqualification to be thrown in the mix. I tell myself that I will not be stopped as I rise up against the heroes of the SCW and I take them out…

One by one…

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<REC

“Merrick Wiseman the Law here in the SCW…the Watchman of the SCW…the former United States Champion here in Supreme Championship Wrestling. The man, the myth, the legend….James Evans will be facing Merrick Wiseman on August 19th, 2015 for the post- Rise to Greatness edition of Breakdown. It is a match that has been months in the making Merrick as the lawman stuck his nose in my business after I handed Gable Winchester his ass during the opening rounds of the Best of the Best tournament. It progressed as he constantly came out and ran his mouth to me, like I am supposed to be intimidated by him, or like I am supposed to respect his authority. I hate to break it ya Merrick, this ain’t South Park and Cartman you are not…I have no respect for you or your authority.

When I came out a few months ago, after wiping the ring mat with the face of Andrew Raynes and I picked up that microphone, and proceeded to cut a scathing promo that pissed a lot of people off, you decided to try to put me in my place. Haha, you’re a funny guy, Merrick. I mean what are you my dad? Are you going to scold me every time I piss and miss the toilet for being fucking hammered? Do you think you’re going to put me in time out? You really have no idea who you’re dealing with here, Merrick. You really don’t have the slightest fucking clue.

I walk to my own rhythm and march to the beat of my own drum. That is when I cut that scathing promo, letting the powers that be in the company as well as the twats in the back that I don’t give two flying flips of a fuck about what they think or how they feel. I meant every single word of what I said, Merrick and when I said I’d be making people my bitches, it was truth. You can chalk that up as arrogance or immaturity. Chalk to whatever you’d like lawman, but you need to go ahead and be prepared to add your name to that list, because it is part of your inevitable future. And you know what they say don’t you Merrick? You can’t stop the inevitable.

I am the future’s present, Merrick and you are a thing of the past. You just don’t realize it. You are a dying breed. You like to be the hero, the all-around good guy. You want to play by their rules. I play by own rules and I will take great pleasure in beating you and giving you as well as everyone else here the Middle Finger to the Establishment…

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